The Texas Tiger Chronicles

Wednesday, December 14, 2005

Pop Culture CommenTerry on Janet, Sanaa/Denzel, Young Buck, and other GOSSIP

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Mood: Happy. I am feeling happy. Not the kind of happy that Mary J "the Queen of Hip-Hop Soul" was feeling when she was cracked out with a nappy blonde weave and dark sunglasses on a mountaintop somewhere singing "All I really want is to be happy." I am the kind of happy that doesn’t require a mirror, a straw and a thin metro card.

Mode: Wearing emerald green flat-front slacks with a beige/emerald green butterfly collar shirt (I loves my retro). My top layer was this sickening zip-sweater by Ben Sherman which I further topped off with a vintage trench-coat. Only thing missing are some gloves. I am hitting H&M after work…but I really want some cashmere gloves for Christmas. Or maybe a pair of Gucci gloves.

Music that started off my day: "Get Together" by Madonna. "Can we get together/I really, I really want to be with you/Come on check it out with me/I hope you feel the same way to"

SIDEBAR: This song is from the new Confessions on a Dance Floor album. This song gives you the "Get into the Groove" vibe. Props to Madonna for taking us back to the 80s but keeping it gangsta for 2005.



Janet – are you paying attention? This is how its done. No more of that coochie-pop music. You are not Beyonce or the pre-op trannie Ciara. Yea, you have a better body than both of them (when you are in concert shape - UNLIKE now). But this next album, Miss Janet "cause I’m nasty," I want you to give me CONTROL Part II. Not JANET. Part V. I am SO SO SO OVER you remaking that same album. Honey, we get it. You are sexy. We get it. You have nice abs. We get it. You talk nasty in your sweet voice. We get it. Next album, DANCE. And no rappers on your album missy! You hear?! No rappers! And stay away from Kanye, Neptunes and Scott Storch. You don’t sound right with them. You just don’t. Go get someone new (not Jimmy and Terry) and rediscover the woman who was once in CONTROL. Cause right about now you giving me a woman CONTROLED BY THE INDUSTRY TRENDS. And I can’t respect that.

Motif: Why are we so celeb obsessed in the US? Is it because celebrities are our version of royalty and in this capitalist society of narcissistic people we take pleasure in their pain and pride in their successes?

I don’t have the answer, but I do have a gossip-obsessed blog that will give you bundles of info to trade with the girls and guys over the water cooler and fake-Starbucks vendors in the break room. SIDEBAR – why does the Starbucks coffee at work taste more like day-old Folgers crystals?

But before we begin, I want to start off with a Haiku inspired by the dinner date I had last night:

The wine has me buzzed
Take me home and ravish me
I am a sure thing



And now for today’s POP CULTURE CommenTERRY

"Tookie" is dead. Seriously, we knew this was coming. He was convicted of killing white folks.

FLASH FLAH FLA - I am SO happy to share this:

The best-sanging girl group of all time reunites (and no it ain’t Destiny’s Child or En Vogue or the Supremes. I know you are saying to yourself, well who is it Terry? Is it Total? Is it the Good Girls? Is it 702? Allure? The Jones Girls? The Emotions? Pretty in Pink? NO: read on.



Patti LaBelle back up with her former backup singers Nona Hendryx and Sarah Dash. In a three-hour session at Ninth Ave.'s Film Center Building, they sang their hearts out and behinds off. The secret project is christened LaBelle, the group's original name.
For all you people who are over 30 and who do not know the power of this group…SHAME on you. For everyone under 30 who thinks Beyonce has the voice of a goddess….get a clue and a Labelle greatest hits package. My suggestion: Something Silver and Nightbirds.

I have so much to say about Labelle. But I am going to save that for tomorrow cause we have lots to dish about and I am sure you want to know what is going on with Tom Cruise today. Aren’t you?

Caroline Hirsch of Caroline's holiday card hopes the year will bring "Scooter Libby's novel, extended Hermes store hours for Oprah, Schwarzenegger's return to acting, Katie Holmes' un-brainwashing, a new racial/gender classification for Michael Jackson." . .

CHRISTMAS sales. So this shoe store had a sale on turtle skin loafers. They sold well, but it took the customers two hours to walk out of the store.

From Cindy Adams:
SO this socialite-lite hits Hermes in a town mall called King of Prussia. She wants the popular Birkin bag the ladies who want everything popular want. The saleslady says, "Sorry. There's a waiting list." She says, "Put my name down on the waiting list." The saleslady says: "Sorry. The waiting list doesn't open for two more weeks."

From Liz Smith:

JOAN COLLINS is 72. But don't tell her! Blessed with incredibly good health and the high spirits of a 25-year-old, Collins is preparing to take a one-woman show on the road in England. Collins' young husband, Percy Gibson, will direct his wife as she sings and tells tales of her life and long, colorful career — as an actress, a femme fatale and as a woman wronged — from romance with Warren Beatty to her late-life career jump as Alexis Carrington in "Dynasty" (She became a big star at age 49!) My own great memory of Collins was watching her do a full split on a dare, after a screening of a TV film in which she performed this athletic stunt. "Oh, that was a double," said a doubter. "No way!" said Joan, who tossed aside her evening bag, shrugged off her fur, and went to the floor with astonishing agility. And rose to her feet without help. This was only about four years ago. What a woman.

Tonight at 9 on NBC's "The Apprentice: Martha Stewart," the final two contestants will be selected. Counting Martha Stewart, that makes three people who still care.

It's no joke: Dave Chappelle's former manager sued the Comedy Central star yesterday, claiming he was cheated out of his share of the millions the hot comic has made. Bosomy



Dolly Parton was even more buoyant than usual yesterday as she floated on the news of her first Golden Globe nomination. "I'm just so tickled," chirped the country goddess, whose tune "Travelin' Thru" received a nod for Best Original Song.

Dolly composed the ballad for "Transamerica," in which fellow Globe nominee Felicity Huffman plays a woman who comes by her breasts the hard way - through a sex-change operation.

SIDEBAR: I saw this movie two days ago and Felicity Huffman may be up for the Oscar!

Usher, Cyndi Lauper and Burt Bacharach all turn to one man to set the mood for lovin: Marvin Gaye. Sharing Marvin as an aural aphrodisiac is one of the true confessions in BlackBook magazine's fun new music issue. Meanwhile, Bacharach says he read six months ago that "Usher said he would like to collaborate with me, and we put in a call, but he never got back to us."

Eddie Murphy and "Access Hollywood" host Shaun Robinson better get a hotel room. A spy tells us that the two were making out in a balcony booth at L.A.'s Laugh Factory as Damon Wayans did a tribute to the late Richard Pryor. Looking on in shock was Chris Rock. "They were all over each other and didn't seem to care that a cameraman was shooting some of it with a long-lens camera," says our snitch ... SIDEBAR: What is the fascination between black women and the gays? I told you a few weeks ago. You take your gay to the mall, not to the altar.

Prince showed up at the Grammy Jams concert at L.A.'s Orpheum Theater hours late for last weekend's tribute to his friend Stevie Wonder. Jamie Foxx, Amerie and Josh Groban all performed Stevie songs at the benefit for Entertainment Industry Foundation's music-in-schools program. But Prince, who just signed with Universal Music, declined to get up and jam ...

TOM Cruise will make a rare personal appearance tonight at the Tribeca Rooftop to raise money for a controversial Church of Scientology program that claims to be healing firefighters and rescue workers who breathed toxic smoke on 9/11.


Cruise is a co-founder of the New York Rescue Workers Detoxification Project, and declares, "More than 500 individuals have recovered health and job fitness through this project — but for thousands more, the passage of time is only bringing more suffering. The strain on their lives, their families and their careers is tremendous."

Tickets starting at $6,250 get you face time and a picture with Cruise, plus dinner and dancing to the Alex Donner Orchestra. No word on whether pregnant Katie Holmes will be by his side. "It will be a night you will never forget," a mailing from Cruise promises.
However, doctors say the "purification rundown" dreamed up by science fiction writer and Scientology founder L. Ron Hubbard is worthless quackery consisting of sauna sweating, ingestion of cooking oil and large doses of niacin.

"IF there had been no Monica Lewinsky, there would have been no Sen. [Hillary] Clinton. She had to run as a victim because she was seen as so controlling" — Maureen Dowd on "The View" . . . "ONE of our makeup artists got Kofi Annan ready for a TV appearance at the U.N. the other day. Kind of embarrassing, when she told him the makeup was oil-based, out of habit he gave her food" — Bill McCuddy on Fox News.

JESSICA Alba ruffled some hipster feathers at the hot MisShapes party Saturday night at Don Hill's. The gorgeous actress turned up with an entourage and was quickly ushered inside — but when head promoter Gordon Nicol asked if she would pose for a photo, Alba turned him down flat. When Nicol pointed out that celebs like Madonna, Hilary Duff and Selma Blair had all posed, Alba supposedly snapped, "I don't care!" and walked away. At that point, one of Alba's entourage told Nicol, "She's a bitch — sorry." Other notables at the bash included Rumer Willis, photographer Ryan McGinley and fashion designers Zaldy and Benjamin Cho

G-Unit rap artist Young Buck has learned his lesson — and he'll put down the silverware when the next brawl breaks out. The rapper (real name: David Darnell Brown) copped a probation plea with the DA, which virtually cleared him in a knife attack that marred the 2004 Vibe Awards in Santa Monica. Cops originally believed Young Buck stabbed an autograph seeker who punched out Buck's mentor, Dr. Dre. But frame-by-frame video analysis showed Young Buck tried to stab the puncher with a fork — and missed. "He understands what he caused and he realizes [he] shouldn't [have] done those things. He's learned his lesson," defense lawyer Scott Leemon said. SIDEBAR: I thought gangstas didn't cop pleas. When push comes to shove, all these rappers turn pu**y. There is only one TRUE hardcore gangsta. FREE LIL KIM!

BRUCE STRIKES OUT WITH PETRA
BRUCE Willis is a single guy looking for love! Pals of Petra Nemcova said the "Die Hard" star tried to get in touch with her via various means last week — even having people call the office of Nemcova's pal Diane Sawyer to try getting her number. Sawyer's people sent them to Nemcova's agency, Next Models, which declined to give Willis' reps her number, but did take his for Nemcova. The model did not call, but finally surrendered her digits to Willis after he showed up at her Light of Heart benefit gala at Cipriani Downtown last Monday, donated what some say was a whopping $50,000 and presented an award. Spies say Nemcova didn't give up her number so easily because she's dating L.A. dilettante/movie producer Matt Palmieri. A rep for Willis said his donation was for far less than $50,000: "Bruce donates to charity all the time. And people from the movie 'Perfect Stranger' were looking for Petra to see if she wanted a role in the movie — not for Bruce." No worries — we hear Willis' eyes may have already wandered onto Hollywood hottie Krista Allen.

ALSO from Cindy Adams
THIS week we lost Richard Pryor, and this week we got a snowstorm. Re minds me of the day he told me: "I flew into New York last night. I escaped California's earthquake in time to make New York's snowstorm." Richard always seemed so cool, even when he was skewered at dinner a whole load of roasts ago and "f" words and "n" words fell out of his mouth at 15-second intervals. But one day Willie Nelson told me: "Richard Pryor asked how come I'm not nervous before a show. Just before I was to go on he said, 'Willie, why ain't you throwin' up?' " SIDEBAR: Sometimes I go to work nervous about my performance. It is good to see that even a genius gets nervous. We are all human.

Gal pal says Jolie's happyto explore the bi-ways



One-time Calvin Klein model Jenny Shimizu (you saw her on TOP MODEL about three weeks ago) said she and former girlfriend Angelina Jolie still have a deep bond.Brad Pitt doesn't have enough to worry about with half the world's men lusting after his girlfriend, Angelina Jolie. Now her one-time lesbian lover has declared: "There has never been an ending to her and I. I think there never will be."Model Jenny Shimizu says, "I think we will continue to have a deep relationship. It really does go beyond just the sex." SIDEBAR: Who besides me thinks Angelina has lip implants? Too bad Melanie Griffith and Lisa Rinna didn't go to her doctor. They both look a hot mess

Moby is sinking his teeth into Eminem's hide again.

"You have blood on your hands," the nerdy techno-wiz tells the macho rapper in a manifesto on moby.com. The longtime foe of Slim Shady charges that the rapper - and those who play his music - are culpable in the murder of a woman by an Eminem fan, Christopher Duncan. Duncan copied a video of his idol by stuffing his victim's body in a suitcase."If a musician made a record wherein he talked about killing blacks and Jews, would he get covered in the press and played on radio and MTV?" writes Moby.

"If the answer is 'no' (as it should be), then why [are] radio and MTV filled with music that has lyrics about killing and brutalizing women and gays?"

Eminem has made light of the murder, saying the 'hype' should help his career and joking that he's "completely innocent. I should be cleared of all charges."

Denzel Washington and Sanaa Lathan stirred rumors after starring in 'Out of Time.'



I hear that glam actress Sanaa Lathan - who'll be on the cover of Essence's March issue - was complaining the other day about the mag's allegedly "tabloid-like measures" in grilling her over unsubstantiated Internet rumors of an affair and love child with Denzel Washington.At two L.A. parties in recent days, according to Lowdown spies at both events, Lathan was overheard slagging off the mag - whose writer Jeannine Amber had asked her the unwelcome questions about Washington, Lathan's co-star in the 2003 movie "Out of Time," after Lathan had already sat for a long interview and a two-day cover shoot."

She said she was extremely disappointed by Essence. She would expect this behavior from a tabloid, not a magazine that is supposed to celebrate black women," said a source.But yesterday - not surprisingly - everybody involved said there was never any problem."She's totally happy with the magazine, and has no issues or concerns with them at all," Lathan's PR rep told me. "In the interview, the rumors did come up, but they knew very well she wasn't pregnant, and the question came up in the context of how do such rumors affect her life."

An Essence spokeswoman wholeheartedly agreed with this interpretation."We're thrilled to have Sanaa Lathan grace our March cover, and in her first solo cover for Essence," the flack told me. "We've had a wonderful experience for her and her team."The cover story is pegged to the February release of Lathan's interracial romantic comedy, "Something New."

The war of the Lohans is over
.Actress Lindsay Lohan's parents finally stopped battling yesterday and reached a divorce settlement ending their stormy 20-year marriage hours before their trial was to start in Nassau County Court.Details of the agreement between mama Dina, 43, and jailed papa Michael, 45, were confidential, but both sides seemed satisfied.

DONNA AND DANTHE
latest pairing on the social circuit? Donna Karan and plastic surgeon Dr. Dan Baker. The two have been spotted around town and were seated together at a CRIAA AIDS benefit last week, along with Karan's daughter, Gaby, and Gaby's husband, Gianpaolo de Felice. This past Friday, the divorced surgeon brought his daughter Lily, who lives with him, to Karan's apartment, where the widowed designer hosted a 41st birthday party for Teri Hatcher that drew "Sex and the City" designer Patricia Field and sculptor Ahn Duong. Neither Karan nor Baker, who is responsible for Karan's youthful face, would comment.We hear. . . THAT Sean "Diddy" Combs personally signed the few remaining bottles of his limited-edition Unforgivable couture fragrance bottles at Saks . . . THAT Star Jones' manly hubby, Al Reynolds, sang along to all the show tunes Robert De Niro's wife, Grace Hightower, belted out at the Operation Smile benefit at Café Carlyle . . .

SIGHTINGS
. . KANYE West stopping by the new Stingaree club in San Diego to guzzle gratis Hennessey for two hours with his posse and leaving his overworked waitress a zero tip. SIDEBAR: All that money and attitude and you acting like a broke a$$ negro?

KATE AVOIDS ENGLAND RETURN
NEWLY sober supermodel Kate Moss will stay in the United States rather than return to Britain, where police have already announced they want to prosecute her for possession of cocaine. The waif was caught on hidden camera in September snorting the drug with her junkie ex-boyfriend Pete Doherty. Moss is likely worried that a drugs conviction would make it difficult or impossible for her to re-enter the U.S. and work here. A source close to Moss told the London Daily Mail, "Although her plan has always been to return to Britain for Christmas, if work commitments mean she needs to stay in the U.S., she will." Moss has been deluged with work in the U.S. since she got out of rehab, and has just finished filming a commercial for Virgin Mobile as part of a $1.2 million deal. The commercial — in which Moss apparently makes fun of her public image — will be screened in the United Kingdom on Christmas Eve.



SHAQ TURNS UP THE HEAT RIGHT AWAY
MIAMI Heat star Shaquille O'Neal didn't wait to start psyching out his old team, the Lakers, in preparation for the Christmas Day matchup. In Los Angeles to play the Clippers, Shaq visited the Staples Center on Sunday as the Lakers were struggling to beat the Charlotte Bobcats. After taking a courtside seat, he smiled as the theme for "Superman" started pumping over the loudspeakers. Shaq, who sports a Superman tattoo, was then shown on the scoreboard screen, prompting most of the 18,000 fans in attendance to give him a standing ovation. Kobe Bryant — the Laker star who wouldn't share the ball with Shaq and forced him to leave L.A. two seasons ago — grumpily huffed after the game that Shaq's presence didn't cause his bad shooting. "Don't really matter to me," Bryant said, unconvincingly.

Coming up: Tomorrow I am going to do a tribute to Labelle and make a very personal plea to Janet Jackson....

Posted by Texas Tiger in NYC :: 4:21 AM :: 2 Comments:

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